Better Together: Daniel embarks on a quest for love

When it comes to love, they say there are plenty of fish in the sea. And SIL resident Daniel is set on a quest to reel in the right girl. With his support team at Rockford and Site Manager Ben Scambary, Daniel has been building his skills and confidence to get into the dating game. Here, Daniel and Ben talk to life in Rockford, their friendship, and Daniel’s quest for love.

Daniel, SIL Rockford Site Resident

I like living in Rockford, it’s a fun house and I’m good friends with my housemates Peter, Eddie and Stephen. Peter and I are very good friends, he likes to have a bit of fun – we go lots of places and watch tv together. Peter is a good listener. Peter and I have been here the longest and helped the other guys settle into the house.

My favourite staff at Rockford is Terri Smith. I get along really well with her. We have a laugh, she’s funny. We watch the footy together – she also supports the Broncos. Her whole family supports the broncos! So, we have that in common.

Terri’s daughter works close by, and we love to go visit and go to Cash Converters. I have more DVDs than a blockbuster, and I like to buy and sell them at Cash Converters. I like all the action ones; spooky ones and my favourite all-time series are the Marvel movies and the Halloween movies.

I love Halloween and so does Terri. Last year we went to a big Halloween party at the Coachwood house. Maybe this year we will throw a party at Rockford and the Coachwood guys can come here! If we have a party I’m going to dress up as Michael Myers.

I got a job recently. I wanted more responsibility and to be able to save money. My job involves picking up pamphlets from a storage facility, rolling them up, putting them in a box and I deliver them by walking. It’s good exercise.

There’s lots I want to do with the money I am saving. I want to go to a holiday in Queensland and see the theme parks – Dream World, Movie World and see the dolphins at Sea World. I have been before, but it was a long time ago.

I’m looking for a girlfriend. I want a nice one with a good personality, who likes movies and who likes to laugh. We might go out and do things together, like go to the theatre to see a movie.

I went to a dating course where they taught us how to speak to girls. The main things I learnt were to be nice and to be myself. After this I went speed dating. I had to tick a box saying which girl I would like to talk to again.

I did like one girl and I hope to see her again, but I have to wait for the email saying if she would like to see me again too. Whatever happens, I’m going to keep trying with dating events and stick at it.

Ben Scamby, Rockford Site Manager

Daniel and I first met when he was moving out of living at home with his dad, and into a Supported Independent Living (SIL) home at Scope NSW. It was a really busy period for Daniel, but I remember thinking that he handled it all really well.

Since that time, our relationship has really built. We don’t always see eye-to-eye, but we respect each other’s opinions and Daniel knows I always want what’s best for him. We don’t take things too seriously and like to have a joke together.

We love to talk footy. Daniel’s a huge Broncos supporter and I go for the Sharks – there’s a bit of a contest there. The Broncos have gotten the better of the Sharks a bit lately, so Daniel’s definitely got bragging rights there.

Right now, Daniel’s goal is to find a girlfriend. The team here at Rockford, alongside his clinician, have been supporting Daniel to build his confidence and interpersonal skills so that he can be more social and start dating.

Over the past couple of months Daniel has been attending dating courses. The skills and confidence he’s developed during this time have been noticeable – and it’s had such a positive impact on other areas of his life. These new skills have certainly helped him with getting his pamphlet delivery job and he seems much happier.

In July Daniel attended a speed dating event. Although it was small, and only two women attended (to Daniel’s dismay!), we were impressed to see Daniel engaging in conversations with different people and just generally enjoying himself.

Leading up to the event Daniel took pride in his appearance the Rockford team supported him to buy new clothes. On the big day, Daniel made sure that he was well presented.

It’s a shame there aren’t more of these types of activities around and it’s something I hope gains more momentum in the disability sector. I see the lack of opportunities like these as the biggest barrier for Daniel in finding a partner.

Daniel has matured so much since moving out of home and into a house with housemates. He’s become a totally different person – he’s much more calm, relaxed, and doesn’t get upset as much. He’s become comfortable as the person that he is, and now opens up and communicates about what he wants and doesn’t want.

He’s really embraced the opportunities available to him. Daniel’s a great guy and I admire that he will talk about what he wants and sticks to it. I hope he can continue to build his social circle – not just with finding a girlfriend, but also by building a good group of mates. The skills he’s developing through his dating courses are skills that will help with any close relationships.

Daniel’s big goal is to move out and live independently. Down the track, I can see that happening for him. He’s got a way to go still, but he’s on the right path and he’s got a team behind him that will back him all the way.